Why Writers Should Read Part 3

Today's topic: Dialogue Fluidity

If you missed parts 1 and 2 click here.

I can't help but start with a duh statement, which I'd like to take credit for but it probably has been said by some famous person like Jane Austen: The more I read, the more I learn how to write. 

The epiphany struck me as I finished my challenge book for this post. (Kudos to all of you who finished a book during the last two weeks including my fab accountability partners: Jeanne T, Jodi Janz,  Amy Jane Helmericks, and Beth Voght) Jeanne went to Beth's book launch last Saturday!

My challenge book, thrust upon me by office coworkers who insisted I read it next, was The Lucky One by Nicholas Sparks. I had read some of his previous works and didn't like them, I'm ducking to miss tomatoes. This book, however, had a gold mine which infused today's concept into my jello brain.

Dialogue is expected to move a story along, but dialogue fluidity is an essential and expected component for successful books. Sure there are other essentials like solid plots, lovable characters (including the bad guy who readers love to hate), ect. However, when dialogue flows like soft butter on bread, readers crave more, spread the word to their friends, and share slices of quotable lines.

How can we make our dialogue fluid?

1. The set up: Oddly enough, this is the absolute key component. If the reader knows where the conversation takes place, at least minimal knowledge of the characters, and what they are doing at the time most dialogue tags can be eliminated. Sandwich the dialogue between descriptive paragraphs.

For example: By page 92 of The Lucky One, the reader already knows Zeus is a dog, Ben is a boy and he is talking with Thibault, owner of the dog. Ben is meeting Zeus.

     Zeus trotted toward Ben, stick in his mouth, then dropped it at Ben's feet. He sniffed Ben, took a step closer, and allowed Ben to pet him.

     "He knows my name?"

     "Now he does."

     "Forever?"

     "Probably. Now that he's smelled you."

     "How can he learn it so fast?"

     "He just does. He's used to learning things quickly."

     Zeus sidled closer and licked Ben's face, then retreated, his gaze flickering from Ben to the stick and back again.

     

Do you see the sandwich? One simple paragraph to communicate the scene: a dog, a boy, a stick, outside, and the dog's owner. The dialogue moves the story forward letting the reader step into Ben's shoes as he meets a lovable dog. Another simple paragraph to reminder the reader who is who and what they are doing.

2. Unnecessary Tags: Each spoken voice does not need a tag and creative tags are definitely not needed for each one, either! Imagine the above dialogue with unnecessary tags:

     Ben asked, "He knows my name?"

     "Now he does." Thibault replied.

     "Forever?" Ben wondered.

     Thibault smiled. "Probably. Now that he's smelled you."

     "How can he learn it so fast?" Ben asked

     "He just does. He's used to learning things quickly," Thibault answered.

Clunky. Like wading through a bog after reading the first version, right? To step your work up a huge notch, look for unnecessary dialogue tags. Before deleting them. Make sure the dialogue is clearly sandwiched between set up paragraphs. The reader needs to know where the characters are, a minimal background, and what they are doing at the time of the dialogue.

3. Avoid Tics: A judge labeled my dialogue tags "tics". My armadillo writer's skin felt that wound. When the wound healed I understood what she/he meant.  Replacing dialogue tags with synonymous movement phrases is like an unnecessary dialogue tag and paints characters as having tics:

     Ben looked from Zeus to Thibault. "He knows my name?"

     "Now he does." Thibault nodded.

     "Forever?" Ben's eyes grew wide.

     Thibault smiled and folded his arms "Probably. Now that he's smelled you."

     "How can he learn it so fast?" Ben shuffled his feat through the leaves.

     Thibault rake his hands through his hair. "He just does. He's used to learning things quickly." 

Do the characters seriously have to move whenever they speak? Yech. So not needed after reading the first version. This form of dialogue tag slows the reader's movement through the story. Its 2:00am, the reader has to be at work tomorrow. She's willing to stay up to 5am if the story compels her to keep reading.

4. Make sense: Read dialogue passages out loud and preferably with either a second person or your schizophrenic partner. (I tend to use the second by changing voices, moving around my work area, you probably don't want to see me then). What seems to make sense in a first draft or an edited version on paper/screen, may not if read out loud.

One disclaimer. This does not mean a periodic "he said, she said" or character movement is not allowed. A well placed dialogue tag is always welcomed:)

Once again I exceeded my time. Your challenge, read a book in two weeks. Look for dialogue passages. Did the author communicated the setting, characters, and what they were doing first? Did it have unnecessary tags? Did the passage avoid tics? 


Can any of these tips help your WIP?

What did you learn from the book you read for the last challenge? (btw you didn't have to finish to answer:) )

Who will be my accountability partner these next two weeks? email me at mimary_vee@yahoo.com



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Photos courtesy of freedigitalphotos.net

This blog post is by Mary Vee
Mary lives in Montana with her husband and loves to hear from her three college kids. She writes contemporary Christian fiction and loves to pen missionary and Bible adventure stories.

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To learn more about Mary, visit her blog http://www.mimaryvee.blogspot.com/
Or email her at mimary_vee@yahoo.com